Thursday, June 10, 2010

For Wondering Minds

Ana and I have been playing a disgraceful game for a little over a year. I actually noticed that she was trying to get into my life last year around April. My Dad had been calling me fat multiple times a day all year. I used to be a Daddy's Girl and so it cut so deeply when he said it. Towards the end of Spring Break, I freaked out. How was I going to pull this off? And then, since I wasn't wanting Ana, I dragged myself in front of a mirror and went, "What do you mean with that bull? Shut up and live how you usually do." Fast forward to...end of May, this year. Our school let out for summer on the 25th. Even before that, Ana calmly met up with me again. I felt fat, ugly, unworthy of anyone's love. I started lying to skip lunch, saying I didn't have lunch money, saying I still forgot it, saying that I told my mom but the bus got there before she could. While all were true, they were all planned. A little after Ana was part of me again, I was realizing slip up. This turned into mild misery that overflowed into a razor head that I had taken from the bathroom. Trust me, I had tried to take it apart, and that hadn't worked. Now, it's the beginning of summer, and I've been having loads of friend problems. We made up, for real, but she hasn't been around. My friends were the only things that kept me away from completely embracing Ana. It was realized that I wouldn't be around any of them for, probably, a while. Being the controlling person that she is, Ana demand that she become my everything. The funny part is, it seems that her demand is being met.
Yep, that's most of my story. But I don't really mind my story. I'm actually pretty happy with it because it's my own, unique, story.

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