Friday, June 10, 2011

Eleven Days

Okay, I know I said I was done with posting here, but for those of you who don't follow my new blog, I want you to know... I'm a train wreck. I'm cutting, burning, panicking because I'm trying not to starve, giving into starving, I'm all over the dang place. Good thing? I have supportive friends and am going back to being super goth, like I was in the fifth grade. I was kinda happy then. I'm 129, BMI of 20.8, 46th percentile. These thoughts make me want to be 110, BMI 17.8, 24th percentile. Part of me just wants to be free.
Now days, I don't know what to listen to anymore. I don't want to eat, know I have to, want to be hope for those who need it, don't think I can be.
It's like, I'm starting to realize...eating normal, this skirt will never fit loosely. I want it to by time school starts. I wanna look cute.
I don't know anymore what to do.