Skins

I started watching it today and it's addicting. One of the things that got me hooked is everyone, everyone!, has ribs showing. The characters are addicting and cutee, also. Like I feel legitly bad for them when it's a sad moment. Poor Stanley. Everything seems to be goin bad. I wanna start bawling for him. But I mean all of them have their beautiful ribs showing. I've never seen mine. I'm just hoping for my hipbones to show. HAHA, I guess you could say it's my thinspo. They're almost alive. And it's beautiful. Wait...how do you end up under the bed?! Haha, This kid's amazing. Sorry, I don't get into many shows and when I do, I get way into them. I'll watch in silence now. Haha.
Oh, I did some exercisee and the more I did, the less I wanted to stop. The less I wanted to just work until I passed out and they found me on the floor. It sounds weird, but that's what I wanted. Now I'm all chilled out again, so it sounds unpleasing, but it was cool when I did.
All the shows about pregnancy make me realize...I'd be scared to be pregnant. My stomach swelling up, huge. Having to eat because it's for more than just myself and I don't want to hurt anyone other than myself. Then...the pain of having the child. It scares me, but I want to have children. Heck it terrifies me, freezes me, makes me wish I wasn't female sometimes, but I want kids. Twins, but just one would be beautiful too. Though, I don't want something that needs me. I can barely take care of myself. My hunger naws at me. A razor cuts me. In the end if these things happen, I hate myself. If they don't, I hate myself more.
Ok, I'm gonna get off. Listen to music, watch TV, go to bed...Not eat. Things like that.