Dang it, Zette.

As much as I love getting awards and things, they also freak me out. I mean, what if I say something wrong? Gosh...
Okay, here we go.

Seven things:
1. Just tonight I told two of my friends I am bisexual and it scared me to do so.
2. I love, love, LOVE V-8.
3. The dude I have a crush on is my opposite to everyone at our school (He's quite attractive, in my eyes, though)
4. I'm terrified that when I change schools, all my friends at the school I'm currently at will forget me.
5. I write as a way to past time. Stories, bad poetry, in my journal, anything to keep my hands moving.
6. I think my therapist is full of shit when she tells me I have troubles coping. No, I know how to cope without cutting; I just like to see my skin ripped open.
7. LAST ONE, WOO! I love my family and friends and you guys. I think I wouldn't be here if it weren't for them. Then again, haha, I probably won't be this bad without a few of my ex-friends!

Okayy, so I guess I've got to give this to a "newly discovered blogger". I'm not sure what that means, but I honestly thinks I'm gonna have to pick Rachael and Lottie because they both have lovely blogs. Even though I don't have Madam Lottie's on the ones I follow, I mean to because it's so...nice. Rachael goes through these amazing changes in moods. Sometimes she'll be too lovely to be real and other times, as though to remind us that she too is completely human, she'll be a jerk. I love it, really. It's not like those who just show one side of themselves.

Okay, now time for a "real" post before bed.
I'm pretty sure I ate more than I should've today. Maybe I shouldn't eat any tomorrow... Like I said, eating scares me, so not eating is always my first option. I hate Easter as much as I love it. I love the whole "Easter Bunny" thing because they sell some of the cutest things involving it and I love coloring eggs. It's all the candy that bothers me. I got a lot of gum today, but it's the 10 calorie kind. I know, almost unheard of, but it was cheaper and Mom had me on a spending limit.
Wow, I just realized that I've said that twice now and didn't know that it did until I said it. Eating scares me. When did that start? I know it did over the summer, but that was because I wanted to be PERFECT for J.P. who I thought I was losing. She was tiny once. I remember her saying she was 90 pounds at five foot three, giving her a BMI of 15.9. But...wow, eating scares me. I mean, I do it like it's nothing, but...it scares me. I'm just in shock. Sorry, I should say something more intelligent, but I just..can't. I mean, I've had dudes ask me out and it didn't startle me this much (my best guy friend did tonight). Okay, I'll try to process it when I get enough sleep.
So, my best dude friend suggested that we should date because he likes me. He's not the dude I have a crush on, but he's still really cute and fun. I told him to let me think about it because I don't want to find out I have a chance with the guy I've got a crush on only to be tied down by the fact that I'm dating this other dude, YET I wanna because he lives in the town NEXT to mine, so I wouldn't be home as much and I could make excuses and not eat as much and maybe have some fun. But I don't want to date right now. I mean, not really...or maybe just not him? UGH, I'm so dang confused!
Okay, I'm gonna ask my mommy if we can go shopping tomorrow because I wanna see if I can find any cute dresses to celebrate spring in. I've lost thirty pounds since July (I know, I'm still fat and should've lost more considering I started overweight), so maybe I'll actually look good in those cute, like, sundresses. I'm gonna go ask her and then go to bed! Goodnight, everyone (Hi there, to my new little follower! thanks for calling my blog cute. :) ).