I went from feeling maybe special to feeling lower than dirt in a matter of hours. Now? Now I wanna take half a pill of melatoin and sleep for hours and then take the other half and go right back to sleep. Not like I matter that much. My "best friend" has realized what I've known, I'm not worth it. My dad yelled at me when I went outside and yelled about fixing the bathroom door. I've been walked in on three times now, twice I was at least partly naked (this time when I was peeing and another time when I was in the shower). I need someone to just hold me and let me cry on their shoulder or for my friend to just talk to me. So I feel like I have some worth. Gosh I just...I'm sick of here. I wanna run away for a week or so, see who would miss me.
Alright, gonna get off, make a few cuts so I can tolerate myself, and then go take a shower.
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